In pain , as expected

There comes a point when your so used to getting hurt, you don't need to cry anymore. There is no point of crying because you know it is normal for you , it was and will always be your fault for letting yourself get hurt .

You feel like screaming but you just sit there in silence. you shut your eyes and just think. All you think there was was only illusions , you have been living in a created world that has nothing to do with reality , you made the un forgivable sin of assuming and expecting things from other .

Sometimes you just shut down... I mean being broken can be exhausting. there comes a point when you realise tears cant change anything. you've been let down by so many people, you've almost learnt to just expect dissappointment from everyone.

You hide behind the words 'im fine' because you know you will never be able to explain exactly how broken you feel, how much pain your in... the hell you are living in, trying seems pointless. you just sit in silence alone. because know no matter how hard you try, you'll never be good enough for anyone except yourself . And you learn never to trust your intuition ever again.